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Ooze Magazine yyyy OOZE MAGAZINE PROUDLY PRESENTS ITS ON-GOING PROJECT: OOZETV VIDEOS! 8 new films! BACK ISSUES 1994-2002 The Sex Issue 50 Years of Ooze THE FINGER Science Fiction Foreigners Teens Xmas Back-to-School Slime Issue Traveling with Ooze ...and more Order Crap Great Price THE FINGER: A Comprehensive Guide to Flipping Off - We wrote it $10 Ooze T-shirts-$10 Ooze Stickers-$1 Disco Jesus shirts and posters-$4 + $10 PRANKS THE FORCE IS A TOOL OF SATAN If George Lucas makes the 7th Sequel to Star Wars - we all die! EL CULO NEGRO for Vice President Our unsuccessful bid to run a Mexican wrestler on the Democratic ticket. PWEETA - People Who Enjoy Eating Tasty Animals We want you to EAT MORE MEAT! About Ooze Who is Ooze? See their compromising photos, and their even more compromising biographies. Live Shows Ooze performs LIVE in Los Angeles and other cities- just not right now. Look here for reviews of past performances, new bookings, and more. Or you can book 'em yourself . THE FINGER: A Great Gift Book Ever wonder who was the first person to flip someone off? I bet you didn't know if happened more than 2500 years ago. THE FINGER is a gift that keeps on giving special love for as long as the paper isn't rotting in a dumpster. GREAT GIFT! Get it from Ooze . Get it from Amazon . FREE ipod Nano! Or Mini Mac! Or a flatscreen The latest in internet marketing scams that even WIRED can't pinpoint quite how it works, but it does . We got a FREE IPOD in time for Xmas. Do Ooze a favor and click those top links and sign up for something you can cancel. PLEASE! Smell the Brussels Sewer! Get Ooze Updates! Want oozing hi-larity delivered to your very own electronic mailbox? Who doesn't? Get the latest word on where Ooze is performing, and when new stuff appears on this very website. Just send us a message that says: I WANT OOZE! subscribeme@ooze.com Search All of Ooze Find: Search the Buttload of Ooze Search: All Products Apparel Baby Beauty Books DVD Electronics Home Gourmet Food Health Care Watches Kitchen Magazines Instruments Music Computers Camera & Photo Software Outdoors Tools Toys & Games VHS Video Games Cell Phones Enter keywords... Ooze Wants You To Search for Amazon Products! THIS IS THE ONLY WAY WE MAKE $! The Sewer Tour is Sponsored in part by Justin Hall's links.net . Justin held a contest in March where we won a round-trip ticket to anywhere in the world for our sewer tour. Thanks! MDT COMMUNICATIONS gave us one of their international cell phones they rent out to people in the Los Angeles area . web ooze.com DinGLE BLOG The Dingleberrys have a new blog over on myspace . Follow their fortnightly adventures as three giant animals try to make their way through the LA Rock Scene and Become Famous . They are retarded. note : you can now JOIN our new RSS feed and submit crap that's yours or that you find somewhere. GO NOW! NEW RSS FEED! - YOU CAN JOIN oozeTV has a new sibling - the oozeTV RSS feed ! Take a peek. Right now there are two ALL-NEW videos up there (and not here) ROBOTS GONE WILD and ALIEN SEX PARTY . Got any videos you want to share? Anyone can link stuff in our Odd Video Collection. After 11 years of not listening to you, Ooze suddenly CARES . HOLLYWOOD SEX TOUR VIDEO Ooze convinces seven unsuspecting tourists in Hollywood to get into a van with us for two hours to see where celebrity scandals happened. We visit the toilet where cops caught George Michael jerking off, the alley Eddie Murphy picked up a foot fetishist cross dresser, where Hugh Grant got his money for his infamous blow job and much much more. Real tour operators felt so threatened they tried to bust us for operating a tour without a licence! See it on OOZETV FREE ipod Nano! Get one, bitch. It's a pyramid scheme that works. Last year I got a free ipod. This year, I want a Nano. You just sucker five friends and yourself to sign up for stupid stuff, and they ship you this thing. I SWEAR. Ooze Editor's L.A. Movie Premeire Ooze Editor MJ Loheed premieres his feature film, FREEZE OUT at the Westwood Film Festival on Sun. Oct. 12 -10:30 pm at the Crest Theatre. It's a comedy about people so into poker, they lose track of the important things in life - like lying to your friends, having sex and cheating - but instead play poker. Or is it the other way around? 1262 Westwood Blvd. LA. The Cast includes Real Celebrities! Click on the link above to find out more or listen to MJ on the radio talking about the movie. IGN.COM Star Wars is Evil Film Mortimer Fontaine of toolofsatan.org was recently spotted on video talking about the Evil of Star Wars to the Mega Gaming Site Now Owned By Fox. Best explanation of the Soul Destroying Nature of Star Wars caught on film. Click the fat face at the bottom to watch. thedingleberrys.com The Dingleberrys are the #1 Band in the World. Their website has a song and video on it, with more to come along with a myspace page! All the Kids like the Dinglberrys Rock! Make them your MYSPACE friends. (They don't have any except for that guy everyone gets) TAP TREK.com You gotta see Tap Trek . Why? Star Trek . Tap Dance . Need I say more? In this new video, the crew of the USS Shufflin' Foot fights Abraham Lincoln for control of the UNIVERSE ! R2-DEMON2 Shirts! Sizes Medium Large Extra Large $17.99 includes domestic shipping People are Stupid Millions of people have visited Tool of Satan , and that's just swell. But this time, (as opposed to 1999) not only do we get reams of hate mail for an obvious joke (many many clues) - we have the world of blogs to peruse. Blogs that post their "thoughts" - and when they finally figure out it's a joke, get to post more. Usually they think it's a bad joke, since they didn't get it themselves. I guess they missed the point. They are the joke. Mostly because people mouth off without thinking. Way too many links to post, so just go to google and look up "toolofsatan" or "r-2-demon-2" and see for yourself. STAR WARS PROTEST GIFT BAGS People have gone super nutty on Tool of Satan . There is even an ebay auction selling the "tools" Target Gift Bags (for very little.) Read about that and more in our very functional Tool of Satan Forums . (new) STAR WARS PROTEST We protest the new Star Wars (again). basically we went to the opening of Star Wars and passed out these flyers . People freaked. See new hyper-christian pamphleteering at the Tool of Satan . Pointless Message Board Talk crap about whatever you want. I set this up so Ooze readers can make their own content for each other and I don't have to. Ooze Message Board . Café Press Deletes "Offensive" Material Citing potential riots, Cafe Press officially removed all "I (heart) Niggers" and "I lIke Kikes" merchandise from the Ooze Store. We adhere to our stand that these shirts are Peace Loving and not racist or offensive. Sadly, it was also our best selling item. If you do like them , please write to us and we'll put you on a list. We're printing a bunch up ourselves! FREE Mini Mac! Get Yours Here!. This internet marketing scams works! We got a FREE IPOD in time for Xmas. Even WIRED can't pinpoint how it works, but it does. Do Ooze a favor and click the top link and sign up for something you can cancel. (SIGN UP for the infone one - it requires a credit card, but does not charge you!) Then you can get a free computer too. Chompo's Lost Lunch One-eye dogs, rainbows, unicorns, and corruption at the highest levels. Ooze's latest family entertainment bonanza is finally finished. 30 pages of doggie fun . Buy Ooze Stuff We've completely revamped the order page -making it much easier to read - and added a whole bunch of new items to t he Cafe Press Shoppee . It has to be seen to be believed. Color Jesus T's, Baby with Fork in Head infantwear, an I (heart) Nigger teddy bear (and T-Shirt), I Like Kikes bumper stickers, and lots and lots of Chompo stuff. Buy Chompo Stuff Visit Chompo's Shoppee and get t-shirts, undie-pants, lunch boxes and more. CHOMPO SCHWAG for XMAS! chompo.com Ooze's popular one-eyed dog, Chompo, now has her own website at chompo.com . This is a no-toothed Chompo fest filled with pictures, videos, animations, stories, and Chompo Merchandise. The Flash Storybook™ Chompo's Lost Lunch is a tour d' force of storytelling - with a cliffhanger ending! Obey the iFilm OBEY THE SIGNS... AND LIVE! is now featured on ifilm . Why see it on a Big Website when you can see it here with out all the crappy ads? It'll be bigger, faster, and put less of a load on our servers and will make us feel cool when lots of people see it and knock on our e-door and make us rich and famous. George Bush "Flip-Off" See the President Flip the Bird LATE BREAKING FINGER NEWS When George Bush was Governor of Texas he gave the camera a "One-Fingered Salute" before going on the air. While Bush may not have been the Commander-in-Chief at the time, this video is historically significant because the highest ranking U.S. official caught flipping someone off previously was Vice-President Nelson Rockefeller in 1975. Mr. Rockefeller was thought to be in the first stages of dementia at the time and died two years later. The same thing could be argued about Bush, but two years later he was made President. (1.1 mb) In July 2004, a protestor reported that Mr. Bush had given HIM the finger, but alas no camera caught the offending gesture. Ooze at Los Angeles (area)Film Festival The Century City Film Festival is sort of proud to present OBEY THE SIGNS... AND LIVE! on the big screen in... Hollywood. Why see it on the Big Screen when you can see it for free online? It'll be, BIGGER, and will make us feel better when you laugh and the rest of the audience is horrified. Want this film in your festival? Event is Over Ooze Guy on 1010 WINS The Finger New York news radio reports on the Finger in america and talks to MATT PATTERSON. (1.5 meg mp3 file) Ooze Guy on NPR This American Life Eddie Schmidt whores out his family to Ira Glass on "This American Life." Ed talks about a piece of cheese that cost his parents $10,000. My Brother's Wedding OOZETV Do you care ? My brother got married and I happened to hold the video camera. I figured I worked on it enough, I might as well share it with the world... IRAQI PRISON SCANDAL PHOTOS Abu Ghraib Photo Shocker Due to the Freedom of Information Act, Ooze has received some shocking new photos of further abuse by the Army on Iraqi prisoners . SEVEN NEW FILMS OOZETV Haven't been to Ooze in a while? See SEVEN new OozeTV episodes. Dildos, Priests, Dogs, NEW CULO NEGRO FOOTAGE, Signs, and the scariest Cream Pie Fight you'll ever see . NEW "award winning" FILM OBEY THE SIGNS ... AND LIVE! Fresh from TROMADANCE 2004 , Ooze's travesty of filmmaking is available for download. Rules exist for a reason, and signs quickly and effectively tell you what to do. If you don’t obey the signs, you could die ...or worse. Le Journál d' Sewer Ooze visited Foreign Parts investigating sewer tours in 10 European cities. Why would anyone want to visit a filthy poo canal? That's what we wanted to know too, since each of these cities has some sort of tour or museum dedicated to sewerage open to the public. To see our regular Humorous Pieces access The Sex Issue or any of our other Back Issues including the World Famous site, THE FINGER where you can read excerpts and order copies of the GREATEST BOOK EVER WRITTEN. Our Plan Why are we going into some of the World's Filthiest Places? Because we can! Read our plan and what you can expect to see if you come back. Rip roaing adventurous fun. (updated) Planning Your Own Sewer Tour Want to waltz through the rivers of waste like Ooze? We've given you all the information you need to see the murk of 12 cities. There's other stuff (like culture and buildings) at these places too, but who cares? © 2003, 1994 - 2003 Ooze Magazine All Rights Reserved
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Glitter Graphics G l i t t e r G r a p h i c s Most Popular Glitter Graphics Click for HTML Codes Blue Butterfly Dog Glitter Graphic Hello Kitty Glitter Winnie the Poo Mistletoe Glitter Graphic Playboy Glitter Graphic Wolf Glitter Graphic Blue Butterfly Santas Little Helper Jingle Bells Graphic Now Providing MySpace HTML Codes, so you can use our Glitter Graphics on your profile! Glitter Graphics Welcome to Glitter-Graphics.us, your source for free Glitter Graphics ! Now you can link your Glitter Graphics to your profile. Enjoy your Glitter Graphics ! Looking for MySpace Layouts , MySpace Graphics , MySpace Codes , or MySpace Backgrounds ? Happy Valentines Day Valentines Day is a day to express your love, and to celebrate the spirit of love. Have a happy and safe Valentines Day! Interact Home Forums About Promote Contact Submit Sitemap Bookmark Us Glitter Graphics Animal Glitter Graphics Cartoon Glitter Graphics Christmas Glitter Graphics City Glitter Graphics Divider Glitter Graphics Flower Glitter Graphics Girl Glitter Graphics Heart Glitter Graphics Holiday Glitter Graphics Kiss Glitter Graphics Pot Glitter Graphics Sports Glitter Graphics Welcome Glitter Graphics Thanks for Add Glitter Other Glitter Graphics Sub Pages Free Glitter Graphics MySpace Glitter Graphics Cute Glitter Graphics Glitter Background Affiliates MySpace Codes Buy & Sell Websites Humor Pokemon Porn Affiliate with Us Glitter-Graphics.us . Privacy . Contact . Xanga Codes Directory School Papers MySpace Backgrounds MySpace Pictures Top 100 Boy Names Top 100 Girl Names Game Hacks Samurai Champloo Funny Poems Funny Quotes Trigun Fullmetal Alchemist Naruto Wallpaper Anime Pictures WWE Divas Bible Black Speed Racer Dog Flu Free MySpace Layouts MySpace Graphics Xanga Layouts Teen Titans
my space' By Laura
MSN Dating & Personals - 'I need my space' -- Web Search: MSN Home My MSN Hotmail Shopping Money People & Chat Sign In Dating & Personals Help Home My Match.com How Match.com Works Article Archive Find Your Match Search for Men Search for Women Dating & Relating Suddenly Single Faith-Based Gay & Lesbian Not a member? Sign up for FREE! Username Password Remember me Forgot your password? Contact Us FAQs MSN Alerts Newsletter Privacy Policy Out & About Most popular on MSN Dear Prudence Workplace first impressions Gay & Lesbian 'I need my space' By Laura Leu It’s the three-word phrase that sends your worst fears spiraling—“I need space.” Does the date you’ve grown so fond of really mean “I need space, but stick around because I’m working on my issues and we’re going to be a killer couple once I’m able to give you what you deserve?” We all hope so. Then again, it could mean, “I’m trying to dump you, but I’m too chicken to say so.” Experts and real people weigh in on how to keep your dignity in this situation… and hopefully the relationship, too. Search for Singles I am a Seeking Between and M W M W 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 located miles of Photos only -- Whose relationship history includes... Whose faith is... Custom search Examine your relationship beyond the bedroom. You don’t necessarily have to be in a good relationship to have sex that knocks your socks (and pants, undies, etc.) off. “Sometimes couples get what I call ‘lust blindness,’ where the sex is fabulous, but that's all there really is,” says Philippa Courtney, author of 4 Steps to Bring the Right Person into Your Life Right Now! The danger is when one partner starts fantasizing that there’s more of a connection than the carnal one. “If a partner is pulling away, take an honest look at the relationship beyond the bedroom,” she says. If good sex is all you have, then that’s probably all you’ll ever have. Your mission: If you two have an emotional connection outside the bedroom, give the downtime a shot. If there’s nothing other than what goes on between the sheets, this is the time to make peace with walking away. Give them what they ask for… The first thing to do if you’re hoping for a successful long-term relationship is respect your partner’s boundaries when they start trusting you with their needs—like wanting space. Trying to talk a date out of spending less time together will only backfire, extinguishing any glimmer of hope for the relationship’s future. “I wanted to see one date less, so I tried to slow things down, but this person decided that hanging out with me even more would make me fall in love and get serious,” says Mike, 25, from Westchester, NY. “Then I actually felt suffocated and cut ties off altogether.” So if someone says the “I need space” line to you, don’t become accusatory or demanding. Ask yourself if you’d be comfortable with a slower pace and someone who’s not ready to jump in full-speed ahead, as you are. If you can honestly live with that for a while without your self-esteem suffering, give it a shot. But if, on the other hand, you feel that your feelings aren’t reciprocated, this can be your wakeup call to make sure you’re tending to your own life and needs versus just creating a happy couplehood. …But never give it twice. A relationship is ideally something that both of you can rely on, even though there will be ebbs and flows. If one partner controls all the starts and stops, it creates an imbalanced power dynamic that spells trouble for a future together. In other words, heed the old adage: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.” “If any person comes back and asks for space after you already backed off once, give them space by promptly changing your number,” says Laurie Frankel, author of It's Not Me...It's You! And Can We Not be Friends? “If you just do it again, you’re allowing him to disrespect you. A guy will treat you as well or as poorly as you let him.” Set deadlines. Deadlines help you set and reach goals—and not just at your job. When your date is wielding excuses — busy at work, confused about some feelings for an ex, not sure whether to get so serious so soon — give them a deadline to get his or her act together or risk losing you. If your honey is serious about being with you, he or she will get right to work. If the object of your affection makes no effort to change, at least you’ll know you gave the person, and the relationship, a fair shot. “I dated someone who would flirt with me until it seemed like it was getting serious, then vanish for a couple of days, only to resurface with some weird excuse,” says Stephanie of Edison, NJ. Stephanie finally got fed up and put her honey on a six-month ban. “I said, ‘Work out your issues and figure out how you feel about me,’” she says. “‘If you’re 100% ready to move forward with me in six months, call me; otherwise, good-bye.’” Pay attention to your watch. If you find yourself constantly playing the waiting game with your partner, chances are, you’re being subtly downgraded from primary date status—with an eye toward possible dumping. “Time is a major non-verbal communicator,” says Lisa Daily, author of Stop Getting Dumped! “If he keeps you waiting, it’s a sign his interest is waning.” She says the same thing’s true if your plans start becoming less and less reliable. When a relationship’s solidifying, you’re more likely to fall into a routine than have to start wondering when you’ll get together again. “If he starts waiting until the last minute to make plans with you, he may be hoping something better will come along,” says Daily. And whose self-esteem should be forced to endure that? You most certainly deserve better! New York City freelance writer Laura Leu has written for Stuff, Maxim, and Sync and contributed to Naked Ambition. Why subscribe to Match.com on MSN Dating & Personals? • Email any of our millions of members • Access to millions of profiles and photos • Find singles who live near you • Share your interests with other singles Start a conversation. Email this article to a friend Printer friendly version More On Gay & Lesbian Dating an older guy How shy guys can win at love Gay & Lesbian Archive MSN Shopping 2005 Microsoft MSN Privacy Legal Advertise Feedback Help --
cool background for myspace.
Myspace Background Image Help, How To, FAQ Join Chatcake - It's FREE! Myspace Guidebook - Myspace Background Help On this page you will learn how to set up a my space background image Setting up a background image for your myspace profile is relatively simple. People mistakenly think that to put an image into the background of your myspace profile you need to know HTML code. However, what this really is called is CSS code (Cascading Style Sheets). It is an "add on" to the HTML webpage programming language. The style of your myspace profile page (or any other webpage for that matter) is controlled by the CSS. This CSS code is usually pasted into your Profile body field on the "edit my profile" page. It's not necessary to copy and paste the code into your profile field, you can also put it into your other fields (interests, music etc), it does not matter. How to copy and paste the CSS code into your profile is explained below but first lets take a quick look at WHAT to paste into your profile to add a background image. Insert the following code into your profile to add a background image body{ background-image:url(http://www.chatcake.com/chatcake-logo.gif);}table,tr,td{ background-color:transparent;}</style In the code above, we're concerned with this line of code: background-image:url( http://www.chatcake.com/chatcake-logo.gif ); Note, it is very important to keep all the brackets and the rest of code syntax in place. For example, when you open a bracket {, it must be closed }, as shown in the code above. What this code does is it puts an image specified by the url (what you see after the "background-image:url", in red) into your myspace profile background. The picture has to be available online, you don't have to upload it. Simply find any image on any website, and right-click on it, then go to Properties on the pop-up menu, and you will be able to grab the URL for that image from there. In this example I use the chatcake logo image located on our server. You need to replace it with your own URL with the desired background image. The second part of the code makes all tables on your profile page transparent. That means that the background will show through any areas where there is information about you. If the part of the code where it says table,tr,td { ... } wasn't specified, your background image would only show in the very background, behind the text and other information about you. Usually that way your profile information will be more visible, and that is, in my opinion better to omit that part. But I am showing it to you just in case you need your profile background image to show through the rest of the page. Try not including that part of the code, save your profile, and see the difference that it makes. Remember, practice is the key to a good profile here. With time you will learn how to modify the rest of your profile with ease. Hopefully you will be able to find a cool background for myspace. Good luck. Extras.. mygen - decorate your profile Quick, with mygen 2 tunes4yourpage.com/ - get music codes for your profile here Kris's MySpace Help Page - help with backgrounds, tables and colors Thomas myspace editor v2 (thomass,tom's) - similar to mygen Thomas myspace editor v2.5 - an updated version of Thomas myspace editor Thomas myspace editor forum - get help from people with experience Miscellaneous.. Myspace advanced profile effects - a blog explaining how to add text and image effects to your profile Chatcake Member Login email password Create an account An alternative to myspace About this page. Myspace is undoubtedly one of the most wide spread community sites online so we will take the mechanics of myspace to demonstrate how a profile can be decorated with html code, music videos and more. Simply select the topic of interest from the list of options above. You will learn how to add video and music codes to your existing profile layout and other tricks. This page has been created due to a heavy demand in knowledge for editing profiles on increasingly popular websites such as chatcake ( chatcake ), myspace , friendster, faces, hi5, yourvoid, xanga and others. As long as the site supports direct CSS/HTML code manipulation you will find information on this site useful for decorating your profile for that site. Chatcake Myspace Profile Guidebook page, updated: May 19, 2005 2005 myspace profile guidebook, contributed by fallout software