my space' By Laura
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MSN Dating & Personals - 'I need my space' -- Web Search: MSN Home My MSN Hotmail Shopping Money People & Chat Sign In Dating & Personals Help Home My Match.com How Match.com Works Article Archive Find Your Match Search for Men Search for Women Dating & Relating Suddenly Single Faith-Based Gay & Lesbian Not a member? Sign up for FREE! Username Password Remember me Forgot your password? Contact Us FAQs MSN Alerts Newsletter Privacy Policy Out & About Most popular on MSN Dear Prudence Workplace first impressions Gay & Lesbian 'I need my space' By Laura Leu It’s the three-word phrase that sends your worst fears spiraling—“I need space.” Does the date you’ve grown so fond of really mean “I need space, but stick around because I’m working on my issues and we’re going to be a killer couple once I’m able to give you what you deserve?” We all hope so. Then again, it could mean, “I’m trying to dump you, but I’m too chicken to say so.” Experts and real people weigh in on how to keep your dignity in this situation… and hopefully the relationship, too. Search for Singles I am a Seeking Between and M W M W 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 located miles of Photos only -- Whose relationship history includes... Whose faith is... Custom search Examine your relationship beyond the bedroom. You don’t necessarily have to be in a good relationship to have sex that knocks your socks (and pants, undies, etc.) off. “Sometimes couples get what I call ‘lust blindness,’ where the sex is fabulous, but that's all there really is,” says Philippa Courtney, author of 4 Steps to Bring the Right Person into Your Life Right Now! The danger is when one partner starts fantasizing that there’s more of a connection than the carnal one. “If a partner is pulling away, take an honest look at the relationship beyond the bedroom,” she says. If good sex is all you have, then that’s probably all you’ll ever have. Your mission: If you two have an emotional connection outside the bedroom, give the downtime a shot. If there’s nothing other than what goes on between the sheets, this is the time to make peace with walking away. Give them what they ask for… The first thing to do if you’re hoping for a successful long-term relationship is respect your partner’s boundaries when they start trusting you with their needs—like wanting space. Trying to talk a date out of spending less time together will only backfire, extinguishing any glimmer of hope for the relationship’s future. “I wanted to see one date less, so I tried to slow things down, but this person decided that hanging out with me even more would make me fall in love and get serious,” says Mike, 25, from Westchester, NY. “Then I actually felt suffocated and cut ties off altogether.” So if someone says the “I need space” line to you, don’t become accusatory or demanding. Ask yourself if you’d be comfortable with a slower pace and someone who’s not ready to jump in full-speed ahead, as you are. If you can honestly live with that for a while without your self-esteem suffering, give it a shot. But if, on the other hand, you feel that your feelings aren’t reciprocated, this can be your wakeup call to make sure you’re tending to your own life and needs versus just creating a happy couplehood. …But never give it twice. A relationship is ideally something that both of you can rely on, even though there will be ebbs and flows. If one partner controls all the starts and stops, it creates an imbalanced power dynamic that spells trouble for a future together. In other words, heed the old adage: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.” “If any person comes back and asks for space after you already backed off once, give them space by promptly changing your number,” says Laurie Frankel, author of It's Not Me...It's You! And Can We Not be Friends? “If you just do it again, you’re allowing him to disrespect you. A guy will treat you as well or as poorly as you let him.” Set deadlines. Deadlines help you set and reach goals—and not just at your job. When your date is wielding excuses — busy at work, confused about some feelings for an ex, not sure whether to get so serious so soon — give them a deadline to get his or her act together or risk losing you. If your honey is serious about being with you, he or she will get right to work. If the object of your affection makes no effort to change, at least you’ll know you gave the person, and the relationship, a fair shot. “I dated someone who would flirt with me until it seemed like it was getting serious, then vanish for a couple of days, only to resurface with some weird excuse,” says Stephanie of Edison, NJ. Stephanie finally got fed up and put her honey on a six-month ban. “I said, ‘Work out your issues and figure out how you feel about me,’” she says. “‘If you’re 100% ready to move forward with me in six months, call me; otherwise, good-bye.’” Pay attention to your watch. If you find yourself constantly playing the waiting game with your partner, chances are, you’re being subtly downgraded from primary date status—with an eye toward possible dumping. “Time is a major non-verbal communicator,” says Lisa Daily, author of Stop Getting Dumped! “If he keeps you waiting, it’s a sign his interest is waning.” She says the same thing’s true if your plans start becoming less and less reliable. When a relationship’s solidifying, you’re more likely to fall into a routine than have to start wondering when you’ll get together again. “If he starts waiting until the last minute to make plans with you, he may be hoping something better will come along,” says Daily. And whose self-esteem should be forced to endure that? You most certainly deserve better! New York City freelance writer Laura Leu has written for Stuff, Maxim, and Sync and contributed to Naked Ambition. 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MySpace.com-Making Some Pretty Good Headway You are here: About > Computing & Technology > Web Search Computing & Technology Web Search Essentials About Web Search 2005 - Year In Review Google Cheat Sheet Free Movie Downloads-Free Audio Clips Internet Search Engines January Web Search Scavenger Hunt Topics Search the Web 101 Internet Search Engines Web Browsers Internet Scavenger Hunts Web Search Shortcuts News Search Online Shopping Search People Search Deep Web Search Reference Desk Multimedia Search Image Search Engines Best Web Sites Web Dictionary Improve Search Engine Ranks Buyer's Guide Top 10 Web Search Books-Holiday Gift Ideas Top 10 Holiday Gifts for Geeks Top 10 Web Search Computer Accessories Top 5 Extravagant Web Search Computer Systems Top 10 Web Search Geek T-Shirts Forums Help FREE Newsletter Sign Up Now for the Web Search newsletter! See Online Courses Search Web Search From Wendy Boswell , Your Guide to Web Search . FREE Newsletter. Sign Up Now! Main | A Novel Approach To Keeping Your Computer Virus-Free MySpace.com-Making Some Pretty Good Headway I learned today that Myspace.com "has surpassed both Hotmail and Google to become the fifth ranked web domain in terms of page views, according to comScore Media Metrix (source: BusinessWire )."This is a social networking/community site; users are invited to create a "community" in which they can share interests, photos, links, etc. Lots of bands are on here as well, last count was 320,000 and growing. Wednesday June 22, 2005 | permalink | comments (0) Email to a Friend Display Latest Headlines | | | Read Archives powered by WordPress Advertisement Related Blogs BoingBoing BuzzMachine FlickrBlog CNET News.com Official Google Blog ResearchBuzz.com Search Engine Watch Blog SearchViews Micro Persuasion Lifehacker More... Most Popular Find Free Movies Top Ten Multimedia Isohunt Bit Torrent Engine Zabasearch.com DogPile What's Hot January Scavenger Hunt - Web Search June Scavenger Hunt- Web Search News From Iraq October Halloween Scavenger Hunt - Web Search Web Search 101 - Learn to Search the Web Related Topics Wireless / Networking Computing Center Email Internet for Beginners Web Logs Topic Index | Email to a Friend Our Story | Be a Guide | Advertising Info | Work at About | Site Map | Icons | Help User Agreement | Ethics Policy | Patent Info. | Privacy Policy | Kids' Privacy Policy ©2006 About, Inc., A part of the New York Times Company . All rights reserved. Around About Popular Cameras, MP3 Players, Phones Guide to Distance Learning How to Make Money on eBay How to Reduce Income Tax PHOTOS: Hybrid Cars What's Hot January Scavenger Hunt - Web Search June Scavenger Hunt- Web Search News From Iraq October Halloween Scavenger Hunt - Web Search Web Search 101 - Learn to Search the Web Headlines The Invisible Web The Invisible Web...ooohhh, spooky. Well, not really, but you How To Add a Google Map To Your Web Page...Fast Have you seen a blog or a website that Quizzes, We Got Quizzes Want to see how much you know about Google? How Develop a Search Plan-How To Search More of the Web Even if you're just doing a casual Web search, it